Hot tears burned my eyes “B...but that can’t be possible. He couldn’t have just left without saying anything!” I almost yelled.
Richard patted my back, “I’m sorry Chidinma, but he did leave. His father needed him back at the company.”
“None of these made any sense to me, he could have just told me! How difficult is that?” Tears flew freely from my eyes and I felt like the earth should swallow me, I was devastated.
“Don’t tell me you are actually in love with him. Are you?” I heard Richard say behind me.
I sniffed and didn’t say anything. I just stood in the middle of his office like a statue while he walked majestically around me. “I see you are… well my dear Chidinma, you are only wasting your time and your tears; you should be with someone like me who knows your worth and would take good care of you.”
I felt disgusted at that moment; I stared at him from his head to toe: he was so short that I could step on him; he had an ugly full beard and a thick mustache. His suit was like a coat on him, gosh! The thought of having something with him, made me nauseous.
“I’ll be leaving now.” I turned to leave.
“Nick said so, you’re such a girl!” He let out a mocking laughter. “He was never in love with you; he just wanted to play around for a while you know? He needed a toy and he found you.”
“That’s not true!” I cried out, but a part of me believed what Richard said.
“Believe it or not, he’s gone forever. Get that into your head.” He walked back to his seat and kept laughing, “Silly girl; you believed all his sweet words.”
I felt humiliated and ran out of the office, tears flying from my eyes; my heart was ripped out and torn apart. My heaven on earth became a living hell.
I got home and broke into more tears, “Nick couldn’t have done this to me, no he couldn’t have.” I tried to convince myself, then I took out my phone and called Nicholas again, hoping it would ring and he would tell me that he’s still in Nigeria and all what his friend said was just a lie. But to my disappointment, that never happened.
I woke up the next day and thought all that happened was just a nightmare, I checked my phone and saw that I had one message, I was excited, but when I checked, it read, “Morning pretty girl, I can imagine how bad your night must have been. I just wanted to remind you that you should think of my proposal. It’s for your own good. You deserve a better man.”
“Such a jerk!” I hissed and threw my phone away.
Now I know it was not a dream. My world felt empty without Nicholas, I was nothing without him, my life was back to the way it was before I met him or even worse, I’ve lost the source of my joy. I cried and cried everyday till tears denied my eyes. I became depressed and sad, so I quit my catering classes and stayed home doing nothing. My life was turned upside down and I found myself hating Nicholas. I gave him my heart, body and soul, yet he dumped me like trash. I was played. But still I couldn’t stop thinking about him; he was graven in my heart. When I woke up in the morning he was the first image in my head, and when I sleep at night, he was the last image I see. I felt like I was going crazy, so pathetic.
I knew I would never forgive him, and I was determined to get my life back. I did what I never thought I would ever do. I applied for a job, and I found myself in an office as the branch manager of a textile company.
Even while working, I kept thinking of our good times together and all the wonderful moments we shared, I knew thinking about him wasn’t helping at all. So I went to my church on a Sunday and talked to my pastor about everything.
I felt like I needed to redeem myself. I was brought up in a religious background: my parents were devoted members of a Baptist church and since I chose to stay in Lagos after I graduated, they couldn’t monitor my religious life like they used to. And of course I drifted for a while before I met Nicholas and then I never went back to church again.
“Old things have passed away and all things have become new.” My pastor finally said and prayed for me. If only it was that easy to forget the past…
Benedicta A. Lawrence is a young Nigerian writer who is a lover of art and nature. She is an aspiring sociologist; artist and life coach. Born in Lagos state; she is an undergraduate in the prestigious Osun State University.